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DORFED

my parents fucking lied

talking to strangers on the internet was the best decision of my life

during sex

  • bae: talk dirty to me baby
  • me: I'm in love with you, and I'm not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things. I'm in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we're all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we'll ever have, and I am in love with you

bagellie:

benefits of being friends with me

  • shitty jokes whenever you ask for them
  • shitty jokes whenever you don’t ask for them
You are so pretty, I would kill to have your eyes and your eyebrow game is on point :)
Anonymous

:)

etceteraface:

thewaywardqueen:

metaphoricalanchor:

i want to write the kind of short stories you read in english class that are on this weird level of surrealism that they still haunt you years down the road

in year 10 i wrote a story and when i got it back my teacher told me he couldnt sleep properly after reading it

please publish that story

i want to hug you, (but I'm tall)
Anonymous

I’m tall too it’s ok

I think you're very very beautiful and have an amazing personality anyone would be happy having you as a friend you are such a good person and smart and funny and overall amazing I'm 13 so I have no chances of being your friend but you are so awesome
Anonymous

send your opinion of me!!

ANONYMOUSLY (OR NOT) TELL ME YOUR HONEST OPINION ABOUT ME. I CAN’T REPLY, JUST PUBLISH.
youknowyouarerussianwhen:

This professor could not find a projector and drew the map of the world himself.

youknowyouarerussianwhen:

This professor could not find a projector and drew the map of the world himself.

gingerafffe:

We cherish every moment.

gingerafffe:

We cherish every moment.

supermoclel:

fuckaclevername87:

supermoclel:

thatskrillmau5chick:

supermoclel:

a brony called me unattractive

that’s

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 right

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he

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me

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ugly

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because i have hair on my legs

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Self absorbed Bitch.

i’m a bitch because i can recognize that i’m not ugly, that i can laugh at someone calling me unattractive for reasons as petty as hair on my legs which EVERYONE grows?

She is most definitely not a Bitch, but yes, self absorbed I’d say from the copious amounts of selfies she takes. 

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dpicchiophotos:

I had my boyfriend who smokes use matches for a few days instead of a lighter and record the date and time and whatever he was thinking about while smoking. 
It’s funny that he quit smoking a few weeks after this project. 

dpicchiophotos:

I had my boyfriend who smokes use matches for a few days instead of a lighter and record the date and time and whatever he was thinking about while smoking. 

It’s funny that he quit smoking a few weeks after this project.